Uncut Hero Stages A Coup And Takes Over The AFR Blog!

Perched on a bar stool in some swanky strip club in the San Fernando Valley, a tall, slightly handsome (think Lou Diamond Philips’ retarded younger brother) kid with messy Zack Efron-like hair and an uncut penis is writing in one of those new dwarf notebooks. Yes, he casually takes a peek at one of the strippers and yes he’s had one too many lapdanced that the girls are now giving him funny looks but he’s getting the job done, damnit!

Ok, yes, I took over Adult Film Radar and yes I’m damn proud of it. It took Fidel a few months the get his hands on Cuba but it took me a few days to secure the rights for the AFR blog and, oh yes, the world. You see, while the others are off working on the main site, I thought I would keep the blog site alive with my personal look into adult films, write a few micro reviews and talk about my experiences as an up-and-coming porn star/porn director.

News flash, this blog site will still be naughty but you knew that the moment you found this site.

Here’s a little something about me, if I may. My name is Eduardo, I’m a 30-something writer who dreamed of being in porn but like every hot-blooded American male, I was cursed with a penis that is considered below average … and it’s uncut so it does look like said penis is wearing a turtleneck. The good news is I know how to use said penis and I use it often by way of a miracle.

As we are in the process of expanding AFR as a site with exclusively original content, particularly of the video kind, I am currently getting the opportunity to finally live my fantasy as a porn star and porn director. I have a number of projects our boss does not what us to talk about because it would ruin the surprises we have in store for you all so I will respect that wish.

What I will say is that I am giving my uncut penis a workout like never before. It started with some amatuer talent and are very quickly working our way to some known talent. One girl who looks like a quiet librarian rode my uncut cock until I exploded in her … shows you that you never judge a librarian by her orthopedic shoes.

In my directorial debut, I even got to fuck a girl with the worst boob job ever and she was voted so in a nude pageant I’m not allowed to mention at this moment. In the spirit of that I would like to nominate the Porn Star With The Best Boob Job Award and this year the award goes to porn star Priya Rai. Just check out these beauties …

Picture courtesy of Priyarai.com

Picture courtesy of RealityKings.com

Congratulations, Priya, aside from being drop dead gorgeous, you have a beautifully done boob job that makes these beauties really well worth drooling!

Kanye West Says …

Yo, I’m, like, really happy for you and everything, Priya. I really am but Lacey Duvall has the best boob job ever. Just look at her, yo.

Picture courtesy of Brazzers.com

Picture courtesy of Brazzers.com

You will most definitely hear more from me and I hope you stick around because AFR is about to get very interesting.

The New Fidel,

    The Uncut Hero

 

Adult Film Radar Closing It’s Doors … For Now

A lot has happened in the past few months … the biggest news being that the site once known as Adult Film Haven has come under new leadership and a staff change. The second biggest news, for us, is that we will be closing our old offices and moving into a bigger office with a film studio for our video projects.

That’s right, AFR will be concentrating on launching our official site a lot sooner than expected. We were originally planning on keeping the blog site running while we worked on original content for our main site but this is only slowing our progress. Instead, we are closing this office and focusing our attention on the official site that will include more articles, more reviews, more porn star spotlights and original video made specifically for the site.

Your humble and cheerful Editor-in-Chief is keeping his title but I am also including Director/Producer to my credit. I’ll be filming original XXX content for the main site and, actually, working on two video projects right now. One is the mentioned Uncut Hero Porn Star Bang … who has shot a hardcore interview/fuck scene with a porn star I won’t reveal here because it would spoil the surprise. I’m also shooting another hardcore scene with a close friend who calls himself The Uncut Jew who will be teaching viewers how to bang strippers.

Oh, there’s more coming up in the video front because I have about a hundred different projects in mind and there are definitely plenty of porn stars to help me make these video projects come to life. On top of that, we have new sections on the site for all your news, porn star and adult film review needs.

We would like to thank you all for helping us make this site possible and for all your wonderfully positive responses. We were happy to bring you news and reviews and we plan to continue the tradition on the main site. It is your loyal readership that has kept us going and we hope to see you on our main site.

We would also like to thank our supporters such as Hustler Video, Vivid Video, Wicked Pictures, Pink Visual, Playboy and the staff of these wonderful companies. We will see you all soon on our official site too.

For now we say thank you and see you soon.

Eduardo Zacarias
Editor-in-Chief

 

We are officially Adult Film Radar!

Things always change whether it’s for the better or the worst but things always change.

Look at us, for instance. We were once called Adult Fim Haven since our old chief has moved on to other things XXX as did the rest of the old staff. I was left holding the reigns as this stagecoach was headed for that cliff like in the old westerns my grandfather loved to watch. That’s Ok, though, because I know how to handle a coach and I’ll save it somehow.

So, as the old saying goes, out with the old and in with the new. We have new staff of editors I introduced not that long ago that includes the lovely Rebecca Mason, the randy Rashid Bay, the cute Heidi Stutgaard and the porn stud in training called the Uncut Hero. As I said, it’s an all new staff here at Adult Film Radar.

Since we were in transition, we missed the month of May, which to us not only the time of month that Latinos celebrate their culture (Cinco de Mayo is celebrated only in Puebla, Mexico but we use it as a day to celebrate Latin culture) but also a time where us new people like to celebrate Latin porn stars.

Picture courtesy of HornySpanishFlies.com

So we decided to take this month as a reminder of how much we appreciate Latinas in the adult film industry that ranges from South American cuties (Alexis Love!) to Mexican cuties here (too many to list here!).

On a political note, we are all for amnesty reform in the United States because why in God’s green Latin-loving world would we want to kick out hard working people. More importantly, why would you want to kick out potential porn stars? Imagine kicking out the likes of this month’s Porn Star of the Month babe Alexis Love if she was born on the other side of the border? Would you kick out a nice piece of ass like that?

Picture courtesy of RealityKings.com

Ok, I’ll stop because this isn’t a politcal blog or website. We’re a sex and porn obsessed site. We would like to recognize the Latinas that makes porn all the more spicy and caliente. So celebrate August by drinking a Margarita and banging a hot mamacita. Better yet, ladies, ride a Mexican! It’s the least we can do for them, right?

So welcome to Adult Film Radar and I hope you enjoy what we have in store for you.

Eduardo Zacarias
Editor-in-Chief

 

Porn Ninjas Still Need Training

It’s been awhile, I know.

Sometimes it feels like we’ve finally got our feet back on the ground and once we start running we hit another wall. Call us the Three Stooges of web design. While we still have a site planned, I think we will be doing business from this blog site so expect more content coming your way.

Thank you for all your kind e-mails and thank you for hanging in there with us. I promise we will bring more content to you in hopes that it would keep you interested until we do launch our main site. Until then, let us make it up to you with Adult Film Haven the blog site.

We’re very happy to bring you articles and features like our Porn Star of the Month. This month we’ve nominated Puma Swede. I mean just look at her, man.

We’ve been thinking about MILFs and cougars all this month, mainly because certain staff members have been hooking up with older woman. The girls in our studio think we finally matured. I mean, yes, we still love college girls our age but older women do bring a lot more to the bedroom.

So, here we are again, back so thank you for staying with us.

Lots of lust,

Zacarias

 

Porn Ninjas-In-Training: March 2009 Monthly Editorial

Please excuse the tardiness of this editorial but we’re all currently working hard on what should be a rather interesting version of Adult Film Haven that will still be a place for news about adult films, porn stars and all things sexual. We have planned and planned and broke out in a cold sweat to come up with a site that continues to bring a lot of what you’re enjoying now as well as extra content that’s a Member’s Only deal.

You see, we plan on shooting our own original content via our own porn production company, Zombie Sex Films. Really, this is just a way for the guys in this office to get laid and to finally bone many of our favorite ladies of porn we had admired as mere writers and observers of the adult film industry. I know, it’s a sacrifice but we do it for the love of porn. We have some original ideas and we have some interesting porn stars attached to our project (not telling … yet) so all we need to do is shoot the content and pray we get our official site up sometime in 2010.

This month is dedicated to blondes as you will see from our Porn Star of the Month … who, incidentally, is one of the porn stars we hope to work with on our official site (crossing fingers). Blondes may be the butt of many a joke but damn it if we don’t get an Empire State Building-sized boner when a hot one crosses our paths. Personally speaking, I’m a fan of redheads but I have to say that a lot of my favorite porn stars are blondes such as Savannah Gold, Carly Parker, Nikki Benz, Memphis Monroe and our Porn Star of the Month, Shyla Stylez. The list goes on and on, my friends.

We also have a few articles for you, especially one from our Uncut Hero who – a week ago at the time of this writing – finally fulfilled one of his biggest fantasies … banging the living shit out of his attractive fifth grade teacher several years later. See, it’s never too late to live out a sexual fantasy, kids. Plus, we other articles, news and reviews as well.

To elaborate a little on our planned original porn shoot, however, I’d just like to say that the boys in the site (and perhaps even our own Topless Swede) will be writing in in a little segment we like to call Amateur Porn Star Diary. It basically will chronicle our Porn Ninja training as we attempt to learn about performing sex scenes and learn a lot about shooting original porn as well. We have a long way to go before this but I just thought you all would like a peek into what he have planned.

Oh, and thank you so much for all the positive feedback we have been receiving about this little blog site. We thank you for your support, kind words of support and even suggestions for making this a site that (we hope) will not fail to turn you on.

Peace and Sex,
Zacarias

 

We’re back! – February 2009 Monthly Editorial

We’re back with a bigger, better and longer-lasting blog site with an all-new staff.

It’s funny how sometimes one problem can turn into two then they start piling up until it becomes what Abraham Lincoln called a “cluster fuck.” Ok, I made up that last part about Abe Lincoln but that’s what happened to us and I have to say that it stopped this site from producing more content for you … our dear readers.

Yet problems also have a way of disappearing and we are happy to report that we are back on our feet again with a new President and a new staff of horny individuals that love sex, porn and even more sex. I mean, this office is just filled with sex and porn addicts who need help right away but are too damn stubborn to want admit it. That’s Ok, though, because that’s exactly what we look for in their applications.

So we’re back, baby, and with a vengeance. If you’ve been away from us I suggest you come back soon. If you’ve been sticking around, then thank you. We love you guys and girls. We have a lot of new things in store for all of you but it’s a little too early to reveal them here.

I thought I would take this space to introduce you to the new staff here in Adult Film Haven. I’m happy to have these men and women onboard and hopefully they will not disappoint in the very least. Here’s the starting lineup:

Editor-in-Chief: E. Zacarias aka Porn Ninja – Your mild-mannered reporter from another planet. Able to sleep with two girls at once because three is pushing it. Loves to hike, swim and go cow tipping. He wishes he was David Hasslehoff just so people can call him “The Hoff.”

Managing Editor:  Rebecca Mason aka Rave Siren – Being a product of the rave scene when it was overrated back in the 90s, Rebecca is a dancing queen. Her dancing skills are so good she danced for classy places such as Spearmint Rhino, The Library in Vegas and Valley Ball. On top of the fact that she’s busty and sexy as hell, she’s a really good writer. Her hobbies include knitting, roleplaying and dating black men. Here’s an anime character that best looks like her:

Reviews Editor: Rashid Bay aka Black Samurai – In his High school, Rashid is famous for being a good Varsity football quarterback but more importantly he is famous for nailing two cheerleaders, a cute nerdy girl and his school’s attractive librarian who still calls him to this day. His hobbies include white girls, Asian girls and Latina girls.

News Editor: Heidi Stutgaard aka Topless Swedish – Hey, did you know that Swedish girls are very comfortable being naked 24/7? We didn’t until we met Heidi who definitely earned her nickname. It’s distracting, really, since she’s got amazingly natural double-Ds.  Her hobbies include not buying bras, that’s for sure. Here’s an anime character that looks a lot like her:

Features Editor: Uncut Hero – The Uncut Hero would like to thank his parents for not removing the foreskin from his penis. It’s a part of him that he likes the most. Sure, it might look like his penis is wearing a turtleneck, but it makes sex feel so damn good. His hobbies include skateboarding, memorizing bad jokes and wondering why the producers of Jackass didn’t accept his application.

So there you have it, folks. That’s your new crew. We have a lot in store for you and we’ll reveal it as we continue to bring you more news, reviews and sex/porn related original features. That’s our pledge to you.

Peace and love,
Zacarias
Editor-in-Chief